Monologues And Quotes By Kurt Cobain – Part 2

kc1Monologues And Quotes By Kurt Cobain – Part 1 is here.

  • The finest day I ever had was when tomorrow never came.
  • I am bad at what I do best.
  • You said that I remind you of yourself tomorrow.
  • And I swear that I don’t have a gun.
  • Thanks to un-encouraging parents everywhere for giving their children the will to show them up and to the white macho american male for reminding the small percent who are capable of recognizing injustice to fight you and earn from your sick sadistic  institutional ways. May you rot in the very reason you even bother to stay alive for.
  • Have you ever had a day when you were going to find a job then it was already two o’clock, so you just blew it off?
  • Yeah I know I am confused uneducated walking cliche but I don’t need to be inspired any longer, just supported.
  • I can’t wait to be back at home (wherever that is) in bed, neurotic and malnourished and complaining how the weather sucks and its whole reason for my misery. I miss you Bikini Kill. I totally love you.
  • No talent is fully organic. Yet the obviously superior talented have not only control of study but that extra special little gift at birth-fueled by passion. A built in, totally spiritual, unexplainable new age, fucking, cosmic energy busting love for passion. And yes, they are even small percent among the small percent. And they are special!
  • No matter what level of intelligence one is on, we all question love and lack of love and fear of love.
  • Its good to question authority and to fight it just to make things a bit less boring but I’ve always reverted back to the conclusion that man is not redeemable and words that don’t necessarily have their expected meanings can be used descriptively in a sentence as art.
  • And this little pit-stop we call life, that we so seriously worry about is nothing but a small over the weekend jail sentence compared to what will come with death.
  • Life isn’t nearly as sacred as the appreciation of passion.
  • It’s hard to decipher the difference between a sincere entertainer and an honest swindler.
  • If you think everything has been said and done then how come nothing has been solved and resolved?
  • After all the hype and ogling over us this past year, I’ve come to two conclusions: 1) We’ve made a better commercial record than Poison. 2) There are quadruple the amount of bad Rock journalists than there are bad rock bands.
  • I am not gay although I wish I were, just to piss off homophobes.
  • I wish there was someone I could ask for advice. Someone who wouldn’t make me feel like a creep for spilling my guts and trying to explain all the insecurities that have plagued me for oh, about 25 years now. I wish someone could explain to me why exactly I have no desire to learn anymore. Why I used to have so much energy and the need to search for miles and weeks for anything new and different. Excitement. I was once a magnet for attracting new offbeat personalities who would introduce me to music and books of the obscure and I would soak it into my system like a rabid sex crazed junkie, hyperactive mentally retarded toddler who just had the first taste of sugar.
  • I will fight to my death to keep the right to provide for my child. I’ll go out of my way to remind her that I love her more than I love myself, not because it is a father’s duty but because I want to out of love.
  • I’ve never taken sides with you or my mother because while I was growing up I had equal contempt for you both.kc2
  • Birds. Birds are and always have been reincarnated old men with Tourette’s syndrome having somehow managed to dupe the reproductive saga. They fuck each other and tend to their home repairs and children while never missing their true mission to scream at the top of their lungs in horrified hellish rage every morning at day break to warn us all of the truth. They know the truth. Screaming bloody murder all over the world in our ears but sadly we don’t speak bird.
  • The whales respond with their message for us in similar ways, by beaching themselves.
  • Theory is a waste of time.
  • I can’t sing or play or rhyme. I think that’s just fine.
  • I feel compelled to say fuck you, fuck you to those of you who have absolutely no regard for me as a person. You have raped me harder than you’ll ever know. So again I say fuck you although this phrase has totally lost its meaning. FUCK YOU! FUCK YOU.
  • If you die you’re completely happy and your soul somewhere lives on. I’m not afraid of dying. Total peace after death, becoming someone else is the best hope I’ve got.

[Didn’t come across the last quote in his Journals, but including it here because I liked it :)]

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Monologues and Quotes By Kurt Cobain – Part 1

41ez-bXi8wL._SX258_BO1,204,203,200_I am currently reading “Kurt Cobain Journals” (written by Kurt Cobain of course). Some writings are beautiful. Some were thought-provoking. And some were down right funny. So I decided to note them down as I go through Kurt’s Journals. And it gives me a weird pleasure to type each of those words of Cobain’s here:

  • If you read, You’ll judge. (On the cover).
  • No amount of effort can save you from oblivion.
  • Don’t read my diary when I am gone. OK, I am going to work now. When you wake up this morning, please read my diary, look through my things and figure me out.
  • To be positive at all times is to ignore all that is important, sacred and valuable. To be negative at all times is to be threatened by ridiculousness and instant discredibility.
  • I feel there is a universal sense amongst our generation that everything has been said and done. True. But who cares. It could still be fun to pretend.
  • Just before I fall asleep and when I am really bored I…lay down and think for a while until I fall into a semi-hypnotic state of sub-consciousness. Some call it day dreaming some call it just fucking spacing out. But I feel like I am not here and it doesn’t matter because I am sick of putting myself in boring situations and conversations. Just everyday sitcom happenings. Some call it thinking but when I am in this particular state of mind, I forget to think and it becomes strictly observatory.
  • Words suck. I mean, every thing has been said. I can’t remember the last real interesting conversation I’ve had in a long time. words aren’t as important as energy derived from music, especially live.
  • Oh I am so damn proud of you. A triumphant victory for mankind. Maybe there is hope. It bought a tear to my eye and a lump in my throat. Staring out the window in a traffic jam for three hours watching the little lawnmower cars zoom past hundreds of happy westerners receiving them with compassionate full contact smile and stare, You’ve made it. Have some fruit. Now you too can purchase pastel bedsheets, electronics and toilet paper of your wildest dreams. You have so much to learn. Thousands of grown infants, rosy red cheeks, fully dressed in acid wash pants and jackets. males with mustache. Ladies with permanent hair. Look over there. Its my mom. She is so many years more advanced in the art of shopping of matching outfits from the luxury of selection. You have so much to learn. Rock and roll has now just begun. Don’t hide the products you have bought under your seats. Prepare yourself for a full search as you enter back through the border. Take note of the leaflets and flyers on your windshield informing you where to acquire credit and legal representation. I am happy for you. Please reproduce. We’re doing all we can over here as well.
  • I’ll be so bored that I’ll just read about what I lived though and purposely stayed naive, because you Mr. Rock Critic are gonna be bored when you are old. Bored Bored Bored. So am I so are old people today. I don’t want a granddaughter of mine changing my soiled rubber underwear while I suck on Ry-krisp, clinging to existence just so I can reminisce about my life as a professional reminiscent.
  • I am threatened by ridicule. I am overly conscious of the sincerity in my voice. I like to have sex with people. I love my parents yet I disagree with merely everything they stand for. I understand and appreciate the value of religion for others. My emotions are affected by music. Punk rock means freedom. I use bits and pieces of others’ personalities to form my own.
  • kcI like punk rock.I like girls with weird eyes. I like drugs (but my body and mind wont allow me to take them). I like passion. I like things that are build well. I like innocence. I like and am grateful for the blue collar worker whose existence allows artists to not have to work at menial jobs. I like killing gluttony. I like playing my cards wrong. I like to write poetry. I like to be with my friends. I like to be by myself. I like to feel guilty for being a white, american male. (slightly abridged)
  • I like sincerity. I lack sincerity. these are not opinions. These are not words of wisdom. This is a disclaimer. A disclaimer for my lack of education, for my loss of inspiration, for my unnerving quest for affection and my perfunctory shamefulness towards many who are my relative age. It is not even a poem. Its just a big pile of shit like ME.
  • I like to complain and do nothing to make things better.
  • I like the comfort in knowing that women are generally superior and naturally less violent than men. I like the comfort in knowing that women are the only future in rock and roll.
  • I have met many minds able to store and translate pregnantly large amount of information, yet they haven’t an ounce of talent for wisdom or the appreciation of passion.
  • The conspiracy towards success in america is immediacy. To expose in great repetition to the minds of small attention spans. Fast, speedy, now with even more nacho cheese flavor!. Here today, gone tomorrow because yesterdays following was nothing more than a tool in every individual’s need for self-importance, entertainment and social rituals. Art that has long-lasting value cannot be appreciated by majorities. only the same small percent will value arts patience as they always have. This is good. the ones who are unaware do not deserve false suggestions in their purchasing duties.
  • I am now in my sad stage, before it was naive hate.
  • I do love playing live. It is the most primal form of energy release you can share with other people besides having sex or taking drugs. So if you see a good live show on drugs and then later that evening have sex, you’ve basically covered all the bases of energy release. And we all need to let off steam. It’s easier and safer than protesting abortion clinics, praising God or wanting to hurt your brother. So go to a show, dance around a bit and copulate.
  • I have been told that an artist is in constant need of a tragedy to fully express their work. But I am not an artist and when I say ‘I’ in a song, that doesn’t necessarily mean that person is me and it doesn’t necessarily mean I’m a story teller. It means whoever or whatever you want because everyone has their own definition of specific words and when your dealing in the context of music you can’t expect words to have the same meaning as in everyday use of our vocabulary, because I consider music as “art”.
  • I am not well read, but when I do read, I read well.
  • I don’t have time to translate what I understand in the form of conversation. I had exhausted most conversation by age nine. I only feel with grunts, screams and tones and with hand gestures and my body. I am deaf in spirit. I purposely keep myself naive and away from earthly information because it is the only way to avoid a jaded attitude. Everything I do is internally subconscious because you cannot rationalize spirituality. We don’t deserve this privilege. I can’t speak. I can only feel. Maybe someday I’ll turn myself into Helen Keller by puncturing my ears with a knife, then cutting my voice box out.
  • If you want to know what after-life feels like, then put on a parachute, go up in a plane, shoot a good amount of heroin into your veins and immediately follow that with a hit of nitrous oxide then jump or set yourself on fire.
  • Just because you are paranoid doesn’t mean they are not after you.
  • God is gay so am I.
  • I’ve probably never met a person whom I feel compatible with my intellectual, spiritual and humorist will.

To Be Continued…

[Click here for Part 2]

Jeanette Winterson

After a very long time, I have found one more author who can weave magic with words. Who could just speak to you. Whose words flow as a river creating soothing sound of flowing water but hitting the rocks with all its might at the same time. I haven’t read her books yet, but just her quotes have got me hooked.

1) Art saved me; it got me through my depression and self-loathing, back to a place of innocence.

2) “What you risk reveals what you value.” – Written on the body

3) “I seem to have run in a great circle, and met myself again on the starting line.” -OrangesAre Not the Only Fruit

4) I don’t read reviews because by then it’s too late – whatever anyone says, the book won’t change. It is written.

5) Naked is the best disguise.

6) You never give away your heart; you lend it from time to time. If it were not so, how could we take it back without asking?

7) You play. You win. You play. You lose. You play.

8) Your weak point is the open, vulnerable place where you can always be hurt. Love, in all its aspects, opens the self so fully.

9) “Why is the measure of love loss?” – Written on the Body

10) “The Buddhists say there are 149 ways to God. I’m not looking for God, only for myself, and that is far more complicated. God has had a great deal written about Him; nothing has been written about me. God is bigger, like my mother, easier to find, even in the dark. I could be anywhere, and since I can’t describe myself I can’t ask for help.” – Sexing the Cherry

11) “Do you fall in love often?”

Yes often. With a view, with a book, with a dog, a cat, with numbers, with friends, with complete strangers, with nothing at all.” ― Gut Symmetries

12) The body can endure compromise and the mind can be seduced by it. Only the heart protests. The heart. Carbon-based primitive in a silicon world.” – The Powerbook

13) “What should I do about the wild and the tame? The wild heart that wants to be free, and the tame heart that wants to come home. I want to be held. I don’t want you to come too close. I want you to scoop me up and bring me home at nights. I don’t want to tell you where I am. I want to keep a place among the rocks where no one can find me. I want to be with you.”

14) “He: What’s the matter with you?
Me: Nothing.
Nothing was slowly clotting my arteries. Nothing slowly numbing my soul. Caught by nothing, saying nothing, nothingness becomes me. When I am nothing they will say surprised in the way that they are forever surprised, “but there was nothing the matter with her.” ― Gut Symmetries

15) “You’ll get over it´ It’s the clichés that cause the trouble. To lose someone you love is to alter your life for ever. You don’t get over it because “it” is the person you loved. The pain stops, there are new people, but the gap never loses. How could it? The particularness of someone who mattered enough to grieve over is not made anodyne by death. This hole in my heart is in the shape of you and no-one else can fit it. Why would I want them to?”

16) “When I look at my life I realise that the mistakes I have made, the things I really regret, were not errors of judgement but failures of feeling.”

17) “In the library I felt better, words you could trust and look at till you understood them, they couldn’t change half way through a sentence like people, so it was easier to spot a lie.” ― Oranges Are Not the Only Fruit

18) “Yes, we are [friends] and I do like to pass the day with you in serious and inconsequentialchatter. I wouldn’t mind washing up beside you, dusting beside you, reading the back half of the paper while you read the front. We are friends and I would miss you, do miss you andthink of you very often. I don’t want to lose this happy space where I have found someone who is smart and easy and doesn’t bother to check their diary when we arrange to meet.

19) “On more than one occasion I have been ready to abandon my whole life for love. To alter everything that makes sense to me and to move into a different world where the only known will be the beloved. Such a sacrifice must be the result of love… or is it that the life itself wasalready worn out? I had finished with that life, perhaps, and could not admit it, being stubborn or afraid, or perhaps did not known it, habit being a great binder. I think it is often so that those most in need of change choose to fall in love and then throw up their hands and blame it all on fate. But it is not fate, at least, not if fate is something outside of us; it is achoice made in secret after nights of longing.”

20) “I was happy but happy is an adult word. You don’t have to ask a child about happy, you see it. They are or they are not. Adults talk about being happy because largely they are not.Talking about it is the same as trying to catch the wind. Much easier to let it blow all over you”

21) “While I can’t have you, I long for you. I am the kind of person who would miss a train or a plane to meet you for coffee. I’d take a taxi across town to see you for ten minutes. I’d wait outside all night if I thought you would open the door in the morning. If you call me and say ‘Will you…’ my answer is ‘Yes’, before your sentence is out. I spin worlds where we could be together. I dream you. For me, imagination and desire are very close.”

22) “I have a theory that every time you make an important choice, the part of you left behind continues the other life you could have had.” ― Oranges Are Not the Only Fruit

23) “Whoever it is you fall in love with for the first time, not just love but be in love with, is the one who will always make you angry, the one you can’t be logical about.” – The Passion

24) “Cheating is easy. There’s no swank to infidelity. To borrow against the trust someone has placed in you costs nothing at first. You get away with it, you take a little more and a little more until there is no more to draw on. Oddly, your hands should be full with all that taking but when you open them there’s nothing there.” — Written on the Body

25) “..to change something you do not understand is the true nature of evil.” – Oranges Are Not the Only Fruit

26) “I didn’t know what hate felt like, not the hate that comes after love. It’s huge and desperate and it longs to be proved wrong. And every day it’s proved right it grows a little more monstrous. If the love was passion, the hate will be obsession. A need to see the once-loved weak and cowed beneath pity. Disgust is close and dignity is far away. The hate is not only for the once loved, it’s for yourself too; how could you ever have loved this?”
― The Passion

27) “There are many forms of love and affection, some people can spend their whole lives together without knowing each other’s names. Naming is a difficult and time-consuming process; it concerns essences, and it means power. But on the wild nights who can call you home? Only the one who knows your name.”
― Oranges Are Not the Only Fruit

28) “Time that withers you will wither me. We will fall like ripe fruit and roll down the grass together. Dear friend, let me lie beside you watching the clouds until the earth covers us and we are gone.” – Written on the Body

29) “She looked at me like I was crazy. Most of my lovers do, and that’s partly why they love me, and partly why they leave”

30) “What is more humiliating than finding the object of your love unworthy?” – The Passion

31) “I don’t know how to answer. I know what I think, but words in the head are like voices underwater. They are distorted.” – Oranges Are Not the Only Fruit

32) “There is no sense in loving someone you can never wake up to except by chance.” – The Passion

33) “I am good at walking away. Rejection teaches you how to reject.” – Weight: The Myth of Atlas and Heracles

34) “He wrote on a piece of paper with his pencil.
Psychosis: out of touch with reality.
Since then, I have been trying to find out what reality is, so that I can touch it.”

35) “What kills love? Only this: Neglect. Not to see you when you stand before me. Not to think of you in the little things. Not to make the road wide for you, the table spread for you. To choose you out of habit not desire, to pass the flower seller without a thought. To leave the dishes unwashed, the bed unmade, to ignore you in the mornings, make use of you at night. To crave another while pecking your cheek. To say your name without hearing it, to assume it is mine to call.”
― Written on the Body

36) “She must find a boat and sail in it. No guarantee of shore. Only a conviction that what she wanted could exist, if she dared to find it.” ― Oranges Are Not the Only Fruit
37) “It may be that you are settled in another place it may be that you are happy but the one who took your heart wields final power.” ― The Passion

38) “Don’t lie. You know you like to view but not to buy. I have found that I am not a space where people want to live, at least not without decorating first. And that is the stubbornness in me: I do not want to be someone’s little home.” ― Gut Symmetries

39) “You said, ‘I love you.’ Why is it that the most unoriginal thing we can say to one another is still the thing we long to hear? ‘I love you’ is always a quotation. You did not say it first and neither did I, yet when you say it and when I say it we speak like savages who have found three words and worship them. I did worship them but now I am alone on a rock hewn out of my own body.” ― Written on the Body

40) “Walk with me, hand in hand through the neon and styrofoam. Walk the razor blades and the broken hearts. Walk the fortune and the fortune hunted. Walk the chop suey bars and the tract of stars.
I know I am a fool, hoping dirt and glory are both a kind of luminous paint; the humiliations and exaltations that light us up. I see like a bug, everything too large, the pressure of infinity hammering at my head. But how else to live, vertical that I am, pressed down and pressing up simultaneously? I cannot assume you will understand me. It is just as likely that as I invent what I want to say, you will invent what you want to hear. Some story we must have. Stray words on crumpled paper. A weak signal into the outer space of each other.
The probability of separate worlds meeting is very small. The lure of it is immense. We send starships. We fall in love.” ― Gut Symmetries

41) All happy families are alike; every unhappy family is unhappy in its own particular way.’ In fact it’s the other way around. Happiness is a specific. Misery is a generalisation. People usually know exactly why they are happy. They very rarely know why they are miserable.” ― Written on the Body

42) “I fell in love once, if love be that cruelty which takes us straight to the gates of Paradise only to remind us they are closed for ever.” ― Sexing the Cherry

43) “Now that I have lost you I cannot allow you to develop, you must be a photograph not a poem.” ― Written on the Body

44) “I had no one to help me, but the T. S. Eliot helped me. So when people say that poetry is a luxury, or an option, or for the educated middle classes, or that it shouldn’t be read at school because it is irrelevant, or any of the strange stupid things that are said about poetry and its place in our lives, I suspect that the people doing the saying have had things pretty easy. A tough life needs a tough language – and that is what poetry is. That is what literature offers – a language powerful enough to say how it is. It isn’t a hiding place. It is a finding place.” ― Why Be Happy When You Could Be Normal?

45) “Are we all living like this? Two lives, the ideal outer life and the inner imaginative life where we keep our secrets?” ― Sexing the Cherry

46) “There is a certain seductiveness about dead things. You can ill treat, alter and recolour what’s dead. It won’t complain. ” ― Oranges Are Not the Only Fruit

47) “I’ve lived my life like a serial killer; finish with one part, strangle it and move on to the next. Life in neat little boxes is life in neat little coffins, the dead bodies of the past laid out side by side. I am discovering, now, in the late afternoon of the day, that the dead still speak.” ― Gut Symmetries

48) “I feel in colour, strong tones that I hue down for the comfort of the pastelly inclined. Beige and magnolia and a hint of pink are what the well-decorated heart is wearing; who wants my blood red and vein-blue?” ― Gut Symmetries

49) “The human heart is my territory. I write about love because it’s the most important thing in the world. I write about sex because often it feels like the most important thing in the world.” ― Gut Symmetries

50) “In this life you have to be your own hero. By that I mean you have to win whatever it is that matters to you by your own strength and in your own way.” – the Powerbook

51) “She had made him possible. In that sense she was his god. Like God, she was neglected.” ― The Passion

Quotes collected over years.

Ayn Rand

  • That love is reverence, and worship, and glory, and the upward glance. Not a bandage for dirty sores. But they don’t know it. Those who speak of love most promiscuously are the ones who’ve never felt it. They make some sort of feeble stew out of sympathy, compassion, contempt, and general indifference, and they call it love. Once you’ve felt what it means to love as you and I know it – the total passion for the total height – you’re incapable of anything less

  • From the smallest necessity to the highest religious abstraction, from the wheel to the skyscraper, everything we are and everything we have comes from one attribute of man — the function of his reasoning mind.

  • It was the only thing I ever really wanted. And that’s the sin that can’t be forgiven–that I hadn’t done what I wanted. It feels so dirty and pointless and monstrous, as one feels about insanity, because there’s no sense to it, no dignity, nothing but pain–and wasted pain…why do they always teach us that it’s easy and evil to do what we want and that we need discipline to restrain ourselves? It’s the hardest thing in the world–to do what we want. And it takes the greatest kind of courage.

  • Listen to what is being preached today. Look at everyone around us. You’ve wondered why they suffer, why they seek happiness and never find it. If any man stopped and asked himself whether he’s ever held a truly personal desire, he’d find the answer. He’d see that all his wishes, his efforts, his dreams, his ambitions are motivated by other men. He’s not really struggling even for material wealth, but for the second-hander’s delusion – prestige. A stamp of approval, not his own. He can find no joy in the struggle and no joy when he has succeeded. He can’t say about a single thing: ‘This is what I wanted because I wanted it, not because it made my neighbors gape at me’. Then he wonders why he’s unhappy.

  • Why do they always teach us that it’s easy and evil to do what we want and that we need discipline to restrain ourselves? It’s the hardest thing in the world–to do what we want. And it takes the greatest kind of courage. I mean, what we really want.

  • Happiness is that state of consciousness which proceeds from the achievement of one’s values.

  • Love is an expression and assertion of self-esteem, a response to one’s own values in the person of another. One gains a profoundly personal, selfish joy from the mere existence of the person one loves. It is one’s own personal, selfish happiness that one seeks, earns, and derives from love.

  • “Mediocrity” doesn’t mean average intelligence, it means an average intelligence that resents and envies its betters.

  • Achievement of your happiness is the only moral purpose of your life, and that happiness, not pain or mindless self-indulgence, is the proof of your moral integrity, since it is the proof and the result of your loyalty to the achievement of your values.